Back in the day (and I only mean 5 years ago), men called you on the phone to get to know you and ask you out on a date. This time period was exciting! You and your potential would talk for hours getting to know each other... sharing hopes, dreams, and different life stories... talking into the wee hours of the night knowing you have to get up early to go to work. Oh.. but work did not convince you to get off the phone and go to sleep. And every conversation grew in length despite the fear that one of you would run out of words and the communication fountain would eventually dry up. Somehow you never ran out of those words and your affection continued to grow. Every conversation built anticipation for the first date and the first kiss and beyond....
What happened to the good ol' days??? Last year I proceeded to go through an entire dating cycle (introduction, dating, and breaking up) ALL through text messaging and email. How is that possible? Text messaging, instant messenger, and email are suppose to be supplements to conversation. People are suppose to use these forms of communication for cute messages and quick updates. They are not suppose to dominate how we communicate with one another or how we date! It is not acceptable to text someone to ask them out on a date. However, somehow we have gone over to the dark side! Breakups, makeups, and arguments... All on text or instant message or email. What happened to the art of expression? Few people actually seem to want to chat on a phone these days. All these forms of communication should bring people closer... And in some instances they have... Long distance does not seem so long when you are in constant communication. I think what has happened is everyone with a slight insecurity (i.e. most of us) has decided to use texting, etc. as a way to cover up those awkward moments in getting to know another person. You cannot stutter through texting and you can be as bold as you want. However, many have failed to recognize that dating should be awkward.... It makes the process exciting and keeps the anticipation going! In the past, I would get pre-date jitters every time I went out with a new guy. No matter what I was calling a girlfriend for a pre-date pep talk. Now, I cannot get excited. Text messaging me does not make me feel connected. I want to hear someone's voice or feel like he is thinking about me because he called to say hello. All of this texting, etc. feels unnatural... It seems lonely and disconnected. I do not want a man to tell me he cares about me through text... Well, I do not mind if he tells me through text BUT not just text... I want him to hear him say it and I want him show me.
So in the face of bigger and better technology we have created a bubble where we can communicate less and hide our emotions more... Text messaging: Dating Friend or Foe. Well, I vote Foe. We already have enough barriers in making real connections with people. Let's put down our key pads and talk... Real talk. I miss the good ol' days.
So what's your vote?
I will say, I have to agree with Alana. The part, though, may stun you. I have to say, there is nothing I look forward to more than those awkward date moments. We all want perfect nights but let be honest, they rarely happen. Plus they only give you good fairy tales. Let me give you an example. Last year a "friend of mine" was trying to set-up the grand gestures for Valentine's Day. However, it can be a challenge to do this when you're visiting her the week before (it's a long distance relationship). Well, when he gets to dinner, hoping for a dessert with Valentine's Day touches, he and his girlfriend are met with a cake saying "Happy Birthday." Now it will take time for the girlfriend to recognize how amazingly awkward (aka awesome) this was, but it's a story I, I mean my friend, will always cherish about our relationship.
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